Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Full Body Scams

This just in: UK Air passengers who refuse a full body scan to be barred from their flights.

I'm all for this. In fact, I just consulted my body, and it says it can't wait to be scanned. As long as it gets to scan the guy who's scanning it.

Good. Sauce. Goose. Gander.

I just hope the advent of full body scans doesn't mean the end of full body pat-downs, I mean no one would want to see those fall by the way-side.

I'm a hip,with-it, post 9-11, post 7-11, post-shoebomber, post pantybomber guy. I'm wearing velcro-laced shoes so I can whip them off at the right moment, and also plan to wear velcro-laced disposable underwear on that great day when I return to Canada from the U.K.

When is that, you ask?

Can't say -- that would be revealing things to the terrorists. Gotta keep 'em guessing.

Flying out of Heathrow on Friday!

Drat -- gave it away.

And that's the way the global Ball bounces.

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"... nothing intellectually compelling or challenging.. bald assertions coupled to superstition... woefully pathetic"