Still wondering which side to root for in the middle east dispute between Israel and Hezbollah/Hamas? Here are ten tips to aid in decision-making for the undecided. I commend them to you:
1. If you have to choose between one side that distributes candy to children when human lives are lost and the other that doesn't, choose the side that doesn't.
2. If you have to choose between one side that puts up billboards facing the other country showing the decapitated head of one of the other side's soldiers (along with provocative commentary), and the other that doesn't, choose the side that doesn't.
3. If you have to choose between one side that uses suicide bombers and one that doesn't, choose the side that doesn't.
4. If you have to choose between one side which seeks the annihilation of its neighbor, and the other that doesn't, choose the side that doesn't.
5. If you have to choose between one side controlled by Muslim terrorists and the other that isn't, choose the side that isn't.
6. If you have to choose between one side that warns citizens in advance that bombs are on their way, and the other that doesn't, choose the side that does.
7. If you have to choose between one side which locates offensive military weapons in residential areas and one that doesn't, choose the side that doesn't.
8. If you have to choose between one side whose combatants dress in civilian clothing and the other side which doesn't, choose the side that doesn't.
9. If you have to choose between one side which teaches its children to hate their neighbour and instills in them the desire to be suicide bombers and the other side that doesn't, choose the side that doesn't.
10. Finally, if you still can't decide: if you have to decide between one side which is God's ancient chosen people restored to the land of their forefathers, and the other side that isn't, choose the side that is.
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