The Unassociated Press.
According to the CCAAA, the lone Sparrow which pooped on U.S. President George Bush on Thursday is on the front lines of global warming. I. B. Burpeen of the Climate Change Alarmist Association of America - the CCAAA - explains that scientists have been expecting BPP - bird poop phenomenon - for months:
"Basically, the warming trends we have been experiencing have loosened the bowels of our feathered friends. Unless man cuts back on C02 emissions, we can expect more airborne bird poop in the future. In fact, the skies will be raining bird poop".
Meanwhile, Climate Change deniers are expected to point out that birds have always been pooping, and that BPP is not a new phenomenon. They are expected to point out that Climate Change projections of increased bird pooping are nothing more than that -- projections.
In another development, the AOCA, the Association of Opportunistic Capitalists of America, have announced that they plan to capitalize on the expected bird poop deluge by offering a complete line of bird poop-resistant clothing, including special deflective hats and shoulder gear.
Clearly, Global Warming is real, and life on earth as we know it will never be the same.