I Categorically Deny Having An Affair With Tiger Woods

The I've-had-a-Tiger-in-my-tank confessional bandwagon is in top gear with no end in sight. At this point, it seems it would be a shorter list, and a quicker process, if those who have not had an affair with Tiger would raise their hands. So, here it is. I have never been with Tiger, and categorically deny any and all vicious rumors to the contrary.

And that's the way the golf-Ball bounces.