Wednesday, December 15, 2010

"The Problem of Evil" Illustrated: Voicemail

Voicemail                            Image via Wikipedia
The problem of evil is considered the most serious objection to belief in the existence of God.

Anyone who has been subjected to the humiliation of voicemail knows the reality of evil; evil exists, and voice mail is its poster-boy, and I want to know the name of the guy behind it.

Tried to call Sears and ask about a vacuum cleaner. How complicated can that be?

1. First call. Have to listen to an "ad" about men's and women's robes; nice try, but, it's not what I'm calling about; then invited to listen to a list of departments. Small appliances are not listed. Go through list again and select major appliances. Connect to major appliances. Get put on hold. Followed by line disconnect.

2. Second call. Go through the same process but at an opportune point I deke them out and dial 0. Am connected with a human being! Ask for small appliances. Get transferred to "Bed and Bath" and am asked to hold. I hold. Being put on hold is voice mail purgatory. Memo to self: maybe the Catholics are on to something. I speak to second person who tells me I have the wrong location and need extension 220. Rather than get patched over, which usually results in limbo-hold followed by dial tone, I say I'll call back.

3. Third call. Listen to the voice ad for the third time. Men's and women's robes are still on for half price! Key in extension 220. Get connected to a voice mail message which asks me to leave a message, followed by second message informing me that messages cannot be left at this time. I try this again and get connected to a voice mail message which asks me to leave a message, followed by second message informing me that messages cannot be left at this time I press 0. I press 0. I press 0. Get the operator again and explain my plight. She offers to page them!  I, Ball Bounces, have caused a page announcement to be broadcast throughout Sears. A frisson of excitement courses through my body!

4. After a suitable wait to allow me to cool down, operator informs me salespeople are all busy with other customers, and I should leave my name and number so they can call me back.

I do and, 15 minutes later, they do.

The Sears vac we want isn't available in Canada.

And that's the way the voicemailed Ball bounces.
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1 comment:

Joe said...

Never attribute to evil what can be explained by old fashioned human incompetence. lol.

"... nothing intellectually compelling or challenging.. bald assertions coupled to superstition... woefully pathetic"