Sunday, September 27, 2009

The 5156 Equality Olympics


Update: Obama Himself Heading to Copenhagen for Olympic Pitch

According to President Obama, the US has embarked on an era of new internationalism. No longer will the US seek to dominate others. Now that the evil Bush has been vanquished, the US will step down and take its place as simply one nation among many. Equality and egalitarianism are the new watchwords. Those Coke commercials from the 70s will be fulfilled at last in the long-awaited but now upon us Obamillenium.

Perhaps someone should tell this to Michelle.
According to the White House, she'll be shilling for Chicago's bid to host the 2016 Summer Olympics.

Surely she must realize that there are 195 (+/-) countries in the world and that, according to her President, every country has an equal right to host the Olympics and no country should seek to dominate any others. And surely she and the President must realize that, with the Olympics occurring once every four years, once a country has hosted the Olympics once it should, in the name of egalitarianism, wait 780 years before seeking to host them again.

And surely they must realize that, since the US has hosted the Olympics four times already, the latest in 1996, a mere 13 years ago, the US's next time up at bat is 5156 -- 3,147 years from now? I'm all for Chicago hosting the Olympics, but, all in good time. I mean, get in line, and wait your turn.

Or was all that talk about the equality of nations and no nation trying to dominate any other nation just a bunch of empty rhetoric?

1904, 1932, 1984, 1996, and now again in 2016?

And that's the way the get-your-tickets-now-for-the-5156-Olympics-to-be-held-at-the-Obamasuperduperdome Ball bounces.

Countries of the world and capitals of every country follow:

Afghanistan - Kabul
Albania - Tirane
Algeria - Algiers
Andorra - Andorra la Vella
Angola - Luanda
Antigua and Barbuda - Saint John's
Argentina - Buenos Aires
Armenia - Yerevan
Australia - Canberra
Austria - Vienna
Azerbaijan - Baku
The Bahamas - Nassau
Bahrain - Manama
Bangladesh - Dhaka
Barbados - Bridgetown
Belarus - Minsk
Belgium - Brussels
Belize - Belmopan
Benin - Porto-Novo
Bhutan - Thimphu
Bolivia - La Paz (administrative); Sucre (judicial)
Bosnia and Herzegovina - Sarajevo
Botswana - Gaborone
Brazil - Brasilia
Brunei - Bandar Seri Begawan
Bulgaria - Sofia
Burkina Faso - Ouagadougou
Burundi - Bujumbura
Cambodia - Phnom Penh
Cameroon - Yaounde
Canada - Ottawa
Cape Verde - Praia
Central African Republic - Bangui
Chad - N'Djamena
Chile - Santiago
China - Beijing
Colombia - Bogota
Comoros - Moroni
Congo, Republic of the - Brazzaville
Congo, Democratic Republic of the - Kinshasa
Costa Rica - San Jose
Cote d'Ivoire - Yamoussoukro (official); Abidjan (de facto)
Croatia - Zagreb
Cuba - Havana
Cyprus - Nicosia
Czech Republic - Prague
Denmark - Copenhagen
Djibouti - Djibouti
Dominica - Roseau
Dominican Republic - Santo Domingo
East Timor (Timor-Leste) - Dili
Ecuador - Quito
Egypt - Cairo
El Salvador - San Salvador
Equatorial Guinea - Malabo
Eritrea - Asmara
Estonia - Tallinn
Ethiopia - Addis Ababa
Fiji - Suva
Finland - Helsinki
France - Paris
Gabon - Libreville
The Gambia - Banjul
Georgia - Tbilisi
Germany - Berlin
Ghana - Accra
Greece - Athens
Grenada - Saint George's
Guatemala - Guatemala City
Guinea - Conakry
Guinea-Bissau - Bissau
Guyana - Georgetown
Haiti - Port-au-Prince
Honduras - Tegucigalpa
Hungary - Budapest
Iceland - Reykjavik
India - New Delhi
Indonesia - Jakarta
Iran - Tehran
Iraq - Baghdad
Ireland - Dublin
Israel - Jerusalem*
Italy - Rome
Jamaica - Kingston
Japan - Tokyo
Jordan - Amman
Kazakhstan - Astana
Kenya - Nairobi
Kiribati - Tarawa Atoll
Korea, North - Pyongyang
Korea, South - Seoul
Kosovo - Pristina
Kuwait - Kuwait City
Kyrgyzstan - Bishkek
Laos - Vientiane
Latvia - Riga
Lebanon - Beirut
Lesotho - Maseru
Liberia - Monrovia
Libya - Tripoli
Liechtenstein - Vaduz
Lithuania - Vilnius
Luxembourg - Luxembourg
Macedonia - Skopje
Madagascar - Antananarivo
Malawi - Lilongwe
Malaysia - Kuala Lumpur
Maldives - Male
Mali - Bamako
Malta - Valletta
Marshall Islands - Majuro
Mauritania - Nouakchott
Mauritius - Port Louis
Mexico - Mexico City
Micronesia, Federated States of - Palikir
Moldova - Chisinau
Monaco - Monaco
Mongolia - Ulaanbaatar
Montenegro - Podgorica
Morocco - Rabat
Mozambique - Maputo
Myanmar (Burma) - Rangoon (Yangon); Naypyidaw or Nay Pyi Taw (administrative)
Namibia - Windhoek
Nauru - no official capital; government offices in Yaren District
Nepal - Kathmandu
Netherlands - Amsterdam; The Hague (seat of government)
New Zealand - Wellington
Nicaragua - Managua
Niger - Niamey
Nigeria - Abuja
Norway - Oslo
Oman - Muscat
Pakistan - Islamabad
Palau - Melekeok
Panama - Panama City
Papua New Guinea - Port Moresby
Paraguay - Asuncion
Peru - Lima
Philippines - Manila
Poland - Warsaw
Portugal - Lisbon
Qatar - Doha
Romania - Bucharest
Russia - Moscow
Rwanda - Kigali
Saint Kitts and Nevis - Basseterre
Saint Lucia - Castries
Saint Vincent and the Grenadines - Kingstown
Samoa - Apia
San Marino - San Marino
Sao Tome and Principe - Sao Tome
Saudi Arabia - Riyadh
Senegal - Dakar
Serbia - Belgrade
Seychelles - Victoria
Sierra Leone - Freetown
Singapore - Singapore
Slovakia - Bratislava
Slovenia - Ljubljana
Solomon Islands - Honiara
Somalia - Mogadishu
South Africa - Pretoria (administrative); Cape Town (legislative); Bloemfontein (judiciary)
Spain - Madrid
Sri Lanka - Colombo; Sri Jayewardenepura Kotte (legislative)
Sudan - Khartoum
Suriname - Paramaribo
Swaziland - Mbabane
Sweden - Stockholm
Switzerland - Bern
Syria - Damascus
Taiwan - Taipei
Tajikistan - Dushanbe
Tanzania - Dar es Salaam; Dodoma (legislative)
Thailand - Bangkok
Togo - Lome
Tonga - Nuku'alofa
Trinidad and Tobago - Port-of-Spain
Tunisia - Tunis
Turkey - Ankara
Turkmenistan - Ashgabat
Tuvalu - Vaiaku village, Funafuti province
Uganda - Kampala
Ukraine - Kyiv
United Arab Emirates - Abu Dhabi
United Kingdom - London
United States of America - Washington D.C.
Uruguay - Montevideo
Uzbekistan - Tashkent
Vanuatu - Port-Vila
Vatican City (Holy See) - Vatican City
Venezuela - Caracas
Vietnam - Hanoi
Yemen - Sanaa
Zambia - Lusaka
Zimbabwe - Harare



5 comments:

Hoarfrost said...

Good one.

BallBounces said...

Thanks! -- have you memorized the list of 195 countries yet -- there's a bonus.

Augray said...

I suspect that not all of the countries you've listed are lining up to host the Olympic Games. And in the case of Vatican City, it's doubtful that its ever even fielded athletes, let alone expressed interest in hosting the Games. Or are you suggesting that each country should be forced to host the Games over the next 780 years?

BallBounces said...

The list of countries is 195 +/- precisely because in some contexts entities like the Vatican are considered a country and in others they are not. Same goes for Taiwan. It is denied recognition for political expedience but I certainly considered it a country when I visited it.

In the spirit of egalitarianism, each country should at least be offered the chance to host the Olympics. If they decline, then the US can move forward in the line, but, if Obama is to be believed, it certainly wouldn't want to dominate other countries or impinge on their chances to host the big O.

Augray said...

In the spirit of egalitarianism, each country should at least be offered the chance to host the Olympics.

But offering such a chance is outside of Obama's purview.

If they decline, then the US can move forward in the line, but, if Obama is to be believed, it certainly wouldn't want to dominate other countries or impinge on their chances to host the big O.

What makes you think that "the big O" has any say in the matter?

"... nothing intellectually compelling or challenging.. bald assertions coupled to superstition... woefully pathetic"